Mauschwitz

6 Dec

Don’t you love it when you hear someone having an entertaining breakdown on the bus? This evening I heard some old sloane shouting at some Bulgarian guy;

(To the man) “I don’t care where you’re from, telling a LADY that you ‘dunno’ IS NOT GOODENOUGH.

(To no-one in particular) No wonder modern society is in the shape it’s in…”

My fellow passengers and I had a great laugh at this. Board a bus (even the almost entirely francophone 74) and you take whatever assertion of ignorance comes your way.

This presented a diversion from my main moral crisis of the day.

This morning we killed the mouse which had for the past two weeks been our very own Bin Laden. It died slowly- its leg got caught in our trap, which it managed to drag halfway across the room before finally realising there wasn’t much point in going on and having a heart attack.

We’d searched every nook, offered a reward to the dustmites. We’d turned the kitchen into a veritable Devil’s garden in order to bring the bastard to justice. Or rather, Hancock had. I’m a vegetarian, you see.

I don’t like mice much, so I got Hancock to set the trap, and when it finally zapped the little fucker, I got him to throw it out the window. What does a vegetarian do with vermin? Does he make like Hitler at the Wannsee conference and because of his non-participation absolve himself of responsibility? Does he choose the path of peaceful coexistence (and adapt to toast with holes in it)? Or does he become a law unto himself?

Ethics, eh? The first hint of moral hypocrisy and you suddenly find you’re comparing yourself to Hitler.

Never mind. No need to dwell. Today has also had its triumphs; not only did I find own-brand gin was on sale at the supermarket, but I also picked up a full packet of cigarettes on the pavement. Disco.

Here is Hancock with the carcass;

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